It is a weird thing when you begin to grow up. I really think that Olaf hit it on the head when he said that everything will make sense when we grow up. It just takes us choosing to look at it to change.
I am turning thirty in just over a month. I am honestly and whole heartedly trying not to freak out because I know that this is nothing. I know that thirty is the new twenty and that I am still a baby. I KNOW I AM BEING A BABY!! I know that this is going to be a new beginning. This is going to be a new me. A healthier and happier me… I hope!
I have always had a goal of losing weight and truly taking good care of myself. I am not sure what we can’t seem to ever really get motivated while other people are health freaks. (I mean that in the most loving way possible). Truly I want to be like that! Why can I not seem to stick to any exercise regimen or any good thing that I start?
I am a firm believer that anything that you stick to for losing weight will eventually work. You don’t have to spend a fortune, or kill yourself. You just have to find something that works for you and STICK TO IT!
The finding something that works for me part isn’t the part that messes me up, it’s the sticking to it! I am not sure why I always have this struggle. BUT ALSO, I must say that I am proud of myself because this year I have lost 50lbs. That is the most weight I have ever lost in my life. I followed the KETO diet to do this. I am convinced that it worked for me because it was something that was sustainable for me.
More importantly I had a goal. My best friend’s wedding was in October and I was a champion at losing weight (without working out) during the entire year. Was I ecstatic with the results? No. I always thought I could do better and the boundless energy was not part of my story. I never spent the time working out. I truly never really committed and focused on myself!
Maybe I push myself to hard. I think for me, it is a rough life because I schedule way too many things in and stress myself to the bone. Being mentally exhausted causes me to be physically exhausted and the cycle continues. I convince myself I don’t have time to work out because the truth is that I just don’t want to. I also just wonder why I don’t like it. I am believing that God will give me a passion for exercise one day. It really is so good for you. We all know that. Why don’t I want to do something that is good for me?
We can be so self-sabotaging. I think that part of this maturing that I am headed towards will bring more awareness about how I get in my own way and how not to do that!
God has also been working on me with regard to people pleasing. I have a horrible tendency to not want to say no to people. This really is terrible for your health and also your family. God has really been revealing to me the damage that can be done to the mental health of myself and my family with this.
Have I mastered it? No. I am still trying to figure out what changes I can make to prioritize what is TRULY important to me. In this day and age it is so easy to fill your day with crap that seems important at the time but is just a huge waste of time.
We are plagued with this as a society and how can we really serve God and enjoy our lives with this terrible mentality? The answer is we can’t. I can’t. I have to let things go. I have watched family members do this and it makes me so sad that we prioritize everyone and thing over ourselves and our health suffers.
I try really hard to follow the wisdom of people more wise than myself that say that we don’t have forever and we need to make sure that we enjoy this ride. This is so true. For those of you that know me, everything going on right now with my dad has made me really realize that this is so true.
I want to commit myself to making time for those around me whom I love. Those things that I would regret not doing when I was laying on my death bed. I don’t want to spend my life chasing the next best thing thinking that it is helping my future and my kids and my marriage when really, it is just stealing my life.
I could go on about this forever.
But, instead I will leave you with this…
I am making a commitment starting now, that I am going to use this year of 2020 to have clear vision. Clear vision when it comes to my goals and dreams for my future. Clear vision when it comes to my family and what is important to me in this life. And lastly clear vision when it comes to my health mentally and physically.
Won’t you join me on this journey? What is God speaking to your heart today?
Love you all for supporting me and reading all my mind dumps. It makes me so happy to know that people love to read my blog posts. I have had people message me out of the blue saying that a message I wrote was timely and touched their heart. I want you all to know that this is the reason that I put these posts out there. We are not alone, we have each other. XO!
Olaf said growing up means adapting and he was totally right…